Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Golden Rule
I have been thinking a lot about the Golden Rule lately: “Treat others as you want to be treated.” When I was in kindergarten, our teacher told us we would live by this motto. As I have grown older, I have realized that most people do not live by this motto. Most people live by the motto, “Treat others as well as possible.” I heard a pastor do a sermon one time where he discussed this concept about the Golden Rule. The following scenario is how he chose to explain the Golden Rule. Imagine that you have a Snickers candy bar and Reese’s cups. These things have been given to you, and you have a friend with you. You love Reese’s, and they are your very favorite candy bar. You also know that your friends’ favorite candy is Reese’s cups, too. You know your friend would be perfectly fine with the Snickers’ bar, and it would be nice of you to give your friend the candy bar. What do you do? Do you keep the Reese’s for yourself and give your friend the Snickers? Is that not what the Golden Rule is all about? You would be giving your friend other candy bar, and if you were your friend, you would want some candy, right? However, the Golden Rule says to treat others as you would WANT to be treated. If you were your friend, wouldn’t you want the Reese’s? It is your favorite candy bar after all. And if you were truly treating others how you wanted to be treated, then you would want which candy bar was your very favorite. Most of us would feel good about ourselves just by sharing our candy with someone else, but in reality, we are probably still being a little selfish by keeping the best for ourselves. That’s not really the heart of the Golden Rule. That’s the heart of the Modern Rule of “Treat others well.” The Golden Rule is so simple, but it’s really difficult. I’ve explained in my earlier blog that my wife and I are doing the Love Dare. In the Love Dare, there is a lot of talk about conflicts in marriage and how to fight fair. The Love Dare references the Golden Rule in fighting, and it makes a lot of sense. In a fight, sometimes we are so concerned about “winning” that we don’t worry about “treating others the way we would like to be treated.” We think that as long as we don’t yell and say terrible things, we are abiding by the Golden Rule, but in reality, that’s still not treating others the way we want to be treated. We want to be right, we want to win, and we want to walk away satisfied that we got what we wanted. All of that adds up to a lot of worrying about ourselves and not the other person. If we’re treating them the way we WANT to be treated, then we worry less about ourselves and winning and more about the way we want them to feel at the end of the discussion. The Golden Rule: a simple concept with complex applications.
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You bring up some great points in this post. My girlfriend and I used to fight very immaturely. Now, I always try and think of things such as, what good is this doing, who am I really considering here, and how would I want to be treated if I were in her spot. I don't even think many people take into consideration the Golden Rule nowdays. People are too concerned with themselves or personal gain and think that they never get treated how they want to and think well if that happens, why should I treat others the way I would want to be treated? I like to hear posts like this and run into people that are very friendly and happy. Atleast there are still some people that believe in the right thing..
ReplyDeleteOk i know what you do here... you take half of each candy bar and give it to your friend and you and him both get the same amount! You are right the golden rule is hard to live by. but i think you should treat others how you want to be treated, and sometimes that means giving up your favorite candy bar! Although there is always a way to meet in the middle! Most people forget about that, it doesnt always have to be one way or another, after all life is mainly about compromise, and that is the main key in marriage or any relationship! :)
ReplyDeleteand hey im with you MD not very many people do think about the golden rule or any rule on top of that, most people are only worried about getting theirs! makes me sad to think this is what the world has come down to. but yes there are still a few people out there that try and do the right thing. I like to think im one of the few haha
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